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[Faith]

So!!!
Those who come from the old forum will be familiar with this... those who don't will quickly learn... XD

To start, here's a quote I acquired the other day at a Cross Country practice...

See, our coach is a bit insane... and he'd been in a teacher meeting all day. He hates structure...
So when he got to practice, he was a little ridiculous.
He actually wrestled with this one kid three times and mock-wrestled a pseudo-coach.
But the quote...
He was talking about how we were switching from endurance to intensity, and was being... well, really weird.
"You are not draft horses! You are stallions... you are studs! Arabians!!!"
And then in response, from this boy in the team:
"Unicorns!!!"

It was... interesting, to say the least.

[Madjack]

"It will be like stealing candy from a dead baby!" ~ Patricia Tannis

Yes. I got the new Borderlands DLC, and it was awesome.

[Faith]

Hm...
I have had some thoughts...
Are we all familiar with MLIA?
Or TFLN, or IGMH, et cetera...

Well, I think that all bits of daily life worth sharing are not reserved just for quotes. Places like those I mentioned allow quotes, events, random observations and whatever other things might be gathered from everyday matters... so basically, they are somewhat like expanded versions of Crazy Quotes.

So, I guess my point is...

I move to make an amendment to the thread of Crazy Quotes, allowing it to encompass all of these things, or to make a new thread meant for this.
All in favor?
All who oppose?

[Dragyn]

Do as you will, Faith.  Pretty sure the old ones got used as such, anyway...

My math textbook cost a bit under $300 dollars.  My math teacher doesn't much care for them.  We came across a colored illustration of a coffee machine.  His response:

"This is why your textbooks cost a million dollars; so you can see the color of coffee[...].  People just couldn't learn back when it was just black and white."

[Felblood]

Blood: It makes me want to exterminate humanity!

A: You always want to do that.

B: I was gonna say.

[Madjack]

Kind of a long convo...

Gekko Gecko says (1:41 AM):
*TIM
*MY COMPUTER IS HAUNTED
Sensei says (1:42 AM):
*...
*-.-
Gekko Gecko says (1:42 AM):
*my email said I had 4 unread messages
*I checked
*NOTHING THERE
Sensei says (1:42 AM):
*that's just a glitch
Gekko Gecko says (1:42 AM):
*HAUNTED oAo
Sensei says (1:42 AM):
*no
*just an email glitch
Gekko Gecko says (1:42 AM):
*HAAAAUNTTTEEED
Sensei says (1:42 AM):
*JUST AN EMAIL GLITCH EVERYONE GETS THEM
Sensei says (1:43 AM):
*did you check all folders?
Gekko Gecko says (1:43 AM):
*yup
Sensei says (1:43 AM):
*huh a glitch
*it happens
Gekko Gecko says (1:43 AM):
*my email's never glitched
Sensei says (1:43 AM):
*well it happens all the time
Gekko Gecko says (1:43 AM):
*and when it has it's said "Yahoo email down check back later"
Sensei says (1:43 AM):
*it happens to everyone
*all the time
*it's common
Sensei says (1:44 AM):
*a nuisance
Gekko Gecko says (1:44 AM):
*HAUNTED
Sensei says (1:44 AM):
*not everything is explained with haunting
Gekko Gecko says (1:44 AM):
*shutupyesitis
*I blame Ripley
Sensei says (1:44 AM):
*HE DOESN'T EXIST
Gekko Gecko says (1:44 AM):
*YOU DON'T KNOW THAT
Sensei says (1:45 AM):
*you made him up
*he's a created caracter
Gekko Gecko says (1:46 AM):
*AS FAR AS YOU KNOW
Sensei says (1:46 AM):
*he's a character
*that you created
Gekko Gecko says (1:46 AM):
*maybe he created ME
Sensei says (1:47 AM):
*that makes no sense
Gekko Gecko says (1:47 AM):
*......................................................................
*scully just said "That makes no sense, Mulder!"
Sensei says (1:47 AM):
*WELL IT DOESN'T
Gekko Gecko says (1:48 AM):
*X-FILES
*IT TALKS TO ME
Sensei says (1:48 AM):
**sigh*
*trying to teach you common sense and logic is pointless
Gekko Gecko says (1:48 AM):
*yes
*yes it is

It talks to me!

[Faith]

"I am more mentally nearsighted. But then some people just look ahead and rush by and don't even notice the abnormal quantity of squirrels."
- Dragyn

[Dragyn]

"I'm writing this blasted story, and not a single logical thing is going to happen in it! "

-Virmir

[Dragyn]

"Johnny was a clever boy
But he's not anymore.
What he thought was H₂O
Was H₂SO₄"

-Rock, Paper, Cynic

[Faith]

The subject of discussion in English class, today:

If you haven't read it already, something that's been around for a while, yet.
A Modest Proposal:
- http://art-bin.com/art/omodest.html
If you've not heard of it, keep in mind that this is... a very interesting satire... XD

And something more modern / a little less formal...
Road Rage:
- http://archive.southcoasttoday.com/daily/02-98/02-08-98/e02li170.htm

After the first one, I guess my teacher had some weird thoughts to share with us...
At least, that was his excuse for this one.
"If you were stranded on an island and had to eat part of yourself, then what would you eat?"
After a collection of responses were given, I thought to myself that this is a rather irrelevant question. Even if you were that near starved, you'd probably just bleed to death trying to eat yourself, anyway. Or get some sort of terrible brain disease like Kuru, tenfold. 
I mentioned to the person next to me that I would probably just avoid eating myself, all together... and he overheard me and looked at me with an odd expression on his face for a moment or two, then asked, "Are you a vegetarian?"

[Felblood]

Oh, Johnathan Swift, your implication that Americans would be the foremost experts in baby eating is quickly forgiven, in the face of your masterfully ironic tirade over beggars using prop children to evoke pity.

I love that guy, and that essay more than I love baby cold-cut sandwiches.

EDIT: The main thing is, I'm not really sure what he's trying to say.

Stop abortion, because babies are meatier if you wait for them to be born? What?

Still... Hilarious.

[Faith]

Hahaha... XD
I've forgive that, too.

Well, according to my teacher, he said all of this because of the economic issues and famine in... I think it was Ireland... or something... and, mockingly, he made this suggestion of eating/-skinning/whatever horrible thing he could think of- children.
At the end, he said what he really thought they should do, but the whole eating babies thing was really good at getting attention and... well... grossing a lot of people out... and being hilarious... XD

Over all, it was a great read.

[Felblood]

Yeah, but he only get's specific on the less controversial issues.

Thesis: All these problems would go away if we could just convince people to act with some decency and foresight. Fairing, we're going to have to settle for a world of baby eating and the rich hunting the poor for sport.

As bitter and snide as Swift was, he could never overcome his optimistic delusion that people could be good to one another in aggregate. Socrates postulated that the bitter misanthrope is the natural evolution of the social optimist. People just can't live up to their expectations, and they end up disappointed and hurt.

[Dragyn]

Well isn't that a cheery outlook...
...but it explains so much...

[Faith]

Huh.
Funny.
I did the opposite...



Gah... the news said it would snow, Tuesday...
I'm not ready!!! O.o
Meh.

...
Wow. That's weird to hear a random snippet of, off the news.
"They're either in jail... or they're Muslims."
Hahaha.

...
... ... ...
My sister asked me about what might be so bad about stem cell research, or something, 'cuz it was also on the news.
Then, while explaining the controversy, I mentioned the existence of glow-in-the-dark mice, with the jelly fish cells...
I watched this joyous, child-like expression bloom up on her face, and she said, "Really!?!"
Then I had to tell her than they didn't really run around in the wild. She was very disappointed.
(It's like the giblets story, all over again... >.> )