Canon Fodder
Archive => Archive => [ARCHIVED] Off-topic => Topic started by: bloodreaper on May 07, 2008, 12:48:00 PM
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The day was
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tomorrow, and in
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that day, there
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was a cow.
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The cow's name
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meant "Great Spotted-one"
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or something similarly
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, being, in cow-speak,
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nonsensical, and mostly
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in "Moos." The
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cow's lanuage was
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undecipherable to people,
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the cows' deliciousness
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undeniable. It's favorite
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pancake recipe, however,
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was revolting, containing
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BBQ smothered cake,
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along with mutant
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potato roots.
However,
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they're still so
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much better than
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the stuff that
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his owner used
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, really. Don't ask.
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He was going
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to town, for
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he was afraid
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that his cow
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was turning into
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a violent and
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irreversibly purple monster,
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because of aliens.
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These aliens invariably
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abduct cows, for
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their conversations're better
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enjoyability.
This is
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their main intent,
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and nothing else
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pleases them.
Back
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to the farmer,
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who just now
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finished eating his
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breakfast, while driving.
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He had decided
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to report the
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cow abductions to
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the local cow
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division of the
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law, acronymed "M.O.O.C.O.W.M.O.O.,"
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without adequate justification.
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On the way,
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he met his
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alternate dimensional self
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and told him
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, "There can only
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be but pi
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^10 of us!"
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Us being a
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fairly subjective term
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(they don't actually
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know what that
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means...)
After they
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got that settled,
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they agreed that
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the world should
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have less cow
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abductions. They planned
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a cunning plan.
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The plan was
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to invade the
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alien cow-abduction
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craft, with a
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chain scythe and
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tons of knives :-X
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.
Nobody butchers their
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their cows without
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Salt and pepper
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to add some
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Good new flavor
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without the farmer's
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Smell. Around the
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towards the end
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of the ship's
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cannon and heavy
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artillery. The cows
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munched, unaware of
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the deranged purple
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people eaters advancing
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on their position.
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They had no
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concept of the
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people eaters, only
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of eating grass.
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The people eaters
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had a concept
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That no person
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from Earth, could
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consist of such
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tasty meat, as
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the juicy flesh
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of cows.
Our
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own flesh is
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quite rangy.
The farmers crept
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up behind the
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alien sentry, intent
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on the task
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of distracting the
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guard with jerky.
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The guard was
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incredibly gullible, and
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the jerky worked.
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As the gaurd
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stupidly consumed the
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thrown treats, they
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crept up on
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the boarding ramp.
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There were many
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glowing orbs inside,
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probably not made
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out of meat.
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They were most
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peculiar, with a
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blueish green glow,
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and emitting a(an)
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mystical tinkling sound.
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A sound entirely
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like a glockenspiel,
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but with little
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of that peculiar
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instrument held reason
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for sounding so
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much like it
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was made of
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buzzing insects in
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a copper bell.
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This was somewhat
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due to the
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Ship's computer system
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tendency to inexplicably
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play German music.
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Glockenspiel music had
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somehow been turned
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into computer programs
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which, inexplicably, allowed
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for hyperspace travel.
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Perhaps this is
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the dread secret
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hiding the real
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alien/government conspiracy
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that was, naturally
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that the aliens
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did whatever they
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were told not
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to, and the
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effect could not
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Be so weird
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as the cumulative
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causes for the
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government's complicity, dispite
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the curios attachment
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of there seeming
(Oops, I forgot this. O.o Sorry?)
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innocuous love of
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toxic waste plants.
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Conspiracies are inscrutable.
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There are, however
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reasons for their
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love for toxic waste
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is probably due
(You can only use three words, Kitty. =J )
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to typographical mistakes.